Dear RONALD MCDONALD,
Well, we are here at the HUGE seaside hotel in the HOT TUB. The weather is PULSATINGLY SWEATY and the temperature is TWO degrees. Our hotel room looks out onto a garden filled with PUSSY trees and tropical PENISES. The natives are all GIGANTIC and spend their time FUCKING and riding their BALLS through the streets. Most of them only speak DIRTY, but I can communicate by making signs with my LABIA. The local food is really WET. Mostly their eat DIRTY Burritos and refried WHIPPED CREAM AND STRAWBERRIES. Our hotel only costs a hundred COCKSUCKERS a day. We are going to spend the week MELTING and then come home.
wish you were here.